gona find out where this guy lives and carve this into things around his area

Did a Fool write this?

I’m not sure what vibes I’m putting out where all my friends tell their doctors they have ADHD and they get a prescription but every doctor I’ve seen has told me they need an official diagnosis from a trained specialist before they’ll consider a prescription

Please also share your first pet’s name and the name of the street you grew up on as a kid! Let’s start some new generations of passwords!

fake ass hunter, i saw you gathering

in david foster wallace's archive, he wrote to this like ex-IRS guy & asked 'how many ppl not paying their taxes would it take for society to collapse?' & the guy was like 'listen, we studied this extensively & we know the answer & nobody will ever tell you the answer.'

Me: Is the natural state of the soul quiet or chaos?

Taco Bell cashier: Look buddy, it’s transient, shifting like water

Favorite cereal of all time.

honey i noticed you were singing the reprise to your i want song. have you undergone character development?

I genuinely can’t think of a bolder way of saying “rich people suck” than Jesus’s camel through a needle comparison and yet the amount of times I’ve been in a Sunday school lesson where a teacher asks “What could he have meant by that?” is astounding

Making a Jurassic Park movie about a guy who went the day before the dinosaurs broke out and is trying to be sensitive about it but also really wants to show you his pictures.

I just found out disney world has a Groot-themed root beer float and they call it the “I Am Float Root Beer' which makes me so so so angry

Cucumbers are so good. And they’re friends with watermelon

Air and Space Museum should have a plane emergency slide you can go down just to get to experience it

Just paid my taxes and I don't say this lightly but wowie zowie

At some point a breadstick becomes a very small loaf of bread. And it’s my job to find out where the line is

Yeah I’m into sports, sports 1990 Los Angeles

I tried everything for my back pain, but then I saw a vague twitter ad from someone with 14 followers and an NFT profile pic. Long story short I am now paralyzed from the neck down

It's cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You're gonna write emails on the computer buddy