José Abreu’s batting average is now lower than his uniform number.

The reason I maintain this twitter account is just in case I ever get asked to be on a Trump jury

12 jurors have been picked for Donald Trump's hush money trial. Selection of alternates ongoing (from The Associated Press) apnews.com/article/b514cb…

RCP is doing everything in their power to not let Biden get ahead in their average and it's very funny

It’s an incredible honor to receive the Kennedy family’s endorsement.
Tune in as I deliver remarks in Philadelphia. twitter.com/i/broadcasts/1…

Republican Clown Car Caucus behaving exactly as expected.

Also, can we get someone who wants to oust Johnson on camera screaming 'I want my MTV?' I think we all deserve that.

To be clear, he’s being threatened for even allowing a vote to come to the floor. For allowing the constitutional process to play out as intended by our Founders. That’s a wild thing to consider, especially when his enemies consider themselves “conservative.” They are not

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If the GOP spent a FRACTION of the effort they spent on this meritless impeachment towards working with Democrats on border reform, we might have passed the bipartisan border bill.

But Trump told his GOP allies in Congress to kill it.

Trump even said: “Please, blame it on me.”

“To validate this gross abuse by the House would be a grave mistake and could set a dangerous precedent for the future,” Mr. Schumer said.

It took only about three hours for the Senate to dispense with the bogus, hyper-partisan impeachment matter. nytimes.com/2024/04/17/us/…

The Bee is not betraying anyone by making jokes about Republicans. In fact, we'd be betraying our own principles if we weren't willing to. If you don't get that, then you don't understand satire.

The hypersensitivity and insecurity on the right these days is just embarrassing.

If saving Mike Johnson gets aid to Ukraine it’s more than worth it.

#Israel should announce that the Mossad has executed its response to the #Iran attack and can’t comment other than it was an overwhelming success that will reap benefits for years to come.

Let them worry about and try to figure out what it was.

Nah, the Grinch actually had a heart.

Can someone PLEASE teach Ted Cruz how to proofread?!

Trump has no idea he's in a criminal trial. He has no concept of the right to remain silent and certainly not the ability to do so. This is a man who has never faced consequences for his actions in his life. He simply can't get it in his cottage cheese brain that he should shut

Our president is not in court today. He’s also awake.

Wow. Maggie Haberman just confirmed that “Trump appeared to be asleep. His head would fall down…He didn’t pay attention to a note his lawyer passed him. His jaw kept falling on his chest and his mouth kept going slack.” Sleepy Don?