My teen is taking the SAT today. As we were walking out the door, I asked her if she needed a special pencil. She looked at me and said We take it on computers. The air hung quiet between us. Oh I said. Huh I said. It’s the first year she added If it makes you feel any better.

Part of being easy to talk to is not listening.

Absolutely incredible.

Tears For Fears - Everybody Wants To Rule The World.

Solo Acoustic Guitar - Kent Nishimura. All of the instruments and vocals — on his guitar…

So single that the remote, phone, and laptop have their own side of the bed and a pillow.

Hear me out, a common sense coach…

Never let anyone recruit you into hating someone who never wronged you.

So much math, so few fingers.

Today can still be the day that you do everything tomorrow.

Treat yourself and others with kindness, for at the end of the day, you'll sleep with your heart, thoughts, and the deeds you carry.

Earth’s blue takes away my blues…

A Kiss tribute band called Smooch.

Nothing funny about waking up with a hurting arm when you slept funny.

It was the best of rhymes, it was the worst of rhymes

*takes delusional as a compliment*

It’s a keep my mouth shut kind of day.

As soon as I open it
I immediately think “you’re gonna step in it”

Takes garbage out to the bin at 2am with smudged eyeliner

Me seeing raccoon: don’t fall in love with me kid
I’ll only break your heart

Eating cauliflower crackers: these don’t even taste like cauliflower

10 minutes later after belching: Ope there it is

Ended tonight's writing session with 'On Broadway' by George Benson.

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The small intestine is bigger than the large intestine.

—Another example of why I have trust issues.

Eating baby kale to heroically save someone else from eating adult kale. You're welcome.