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Fake Showbiz News

@FakeShowbizNews

Clearly labelled parody account | EMAIL: [email protected] | REWARD US: https://t.co/DeOXY6YVmY

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linkhttps://ko-fi.com/fakeshowbiznews calendar_today18-09-2011 11:22:04

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Family of young football fan who wished Roy Keane a “merry Christmas Eve Eve” on 23 December 2021 say he is still not well enough to leave hospital

Family of young football fan who wished Roy Keane a “merry Christmas Eve Eve” on 23 December 2021 say he is still not well enough to leave hospital
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Chris Martin left crestfallen after learning Coldplay’s ‘Christmas Lights’ is NOT among the 33 festive tracks in this week’s UK Top 40.

“Why does Britain refuse to embrace our Christmas song?” he wept

Chris Martin left crestfallen after learning Coldplay’s ‘Christmas Lights’ is NOT among the 33 festive tracks in this week’s UK Top 40. “Why does Britain refuse to embrace our Christmas song?” he wept
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Sarah Lancashire says part of her hopes the European Super League does go ahead and it’s a fucking disaster.

“It would be quite funny,” she said

Sarah Lancashire says part of her hopes the European Super League does go ahead and it’s a fucking disaster. “It would be quite funny,” she said
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Sir Keir Starmer says his biggest regret from his stint in charge of the CPS was failing to bring the Fun Lovin’ Criminals to justice despite them rapping about their unlawful activities over several albums

Sir Keir Starmer says his biggest regret from his stint in charge of the CPS was failing to bring the Fun Lovin’ Criminals to justice despite them rapping about their unlawful activities over several albums
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Rihanna urges people to take time out today to check the Christmas bin collection arrangements for their area.

“Miss an early collection and you’ll be in a world of shit,” she warned

Rihanna urges people to take time out today to check the Christmas bin collection arrangements for their area. “Miss an early collection and you’ll be in a world of shit,” she warned
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Vernon Kay admits he still shudders about the time he was asked to do the music for a funeral - but instead of ‘Angels’ by Robbie Williams he accidentally put on ‘One Pound Fish’.

“To make matters worse I was sweating so much I couldn’t switch it off,” he recalled

Vernon Kay admits he still shudders about the time he was asked to do the music for a funeral - but instead of ‘Angels’ by Robbie Williams he accidentally put on ‘One Pound Fish’. “To make matters worse I was sweating so much I couldn’t switch it off,” he recalled
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Catherine Zeta Jones says she feels a deep sense of rage when she’s done a good word on Scrabble but the next player sticks an S on the end.

“Get your own fucking word,” she fumed

Catherine Zeta Jones says she feels a deep sense of rage when she’s done a good word on Scrabble but the next player sticks an S on the end. “Get your own fucking word,” she fumed
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Channel 4 ‘Dispatches’ investigation into Jessie J’s Hertfordshire abattoir makes number of serious allegations:

• Workers paid as little as £2.15 per hour
• Meat stored improperly
• Employees banned from using the toilet while on shift
• No fire safety plan in place
•…

Channel 4 ‘Dispatches’ investigation into Jessie J’s Hertfordshire abattoir makes number of serious allegations: • Workers paid as little as £2.15 per hour • Meat stored improperly • Employees banned from using the toilet while on shift • No fire safety plan in place •…
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Martin Clunes says good luck to anyone going for the lazy workday hat-trick today - arriving late, taking longer than allowed for lunch and then leaving early

Martin Clunes says good luck to anyone going for the lazy workday hat-trick today - arriving late, taking longer than allowed for lunch and then leaving early
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Sir Ian Botham chuckles as his shopping comes to £20.14.

“That’s the year I accidentally tweeted my dick,” he told the cashier

Sir Ian Botham chuckles as his shopping comes to £20.14. “That’s the year I accidentally tweeted my dick,” he told the cashier
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Margot Robbie says if you’re planning to do your Christmas shopping this week, you’ve left it a bit late haven’t you!

Margot Robbie says if you’re planning to do your Christmas shopping this week, you’ve left it a bit late haven’t you!
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Richard Hammond reveals since sustaining his brain injury, he’s had trouble distinguishing rice from maggots.

“I tend to avoid Indian restaurants,” he told reporters

Richard Hammond reveals since sustaining his brain injury, he’s had trouble distinguishing rice from maggots. “I tend to avoid Indian restaurants,” he told reporters
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Volodymyr Zelensky backs out of attempt to throw apple core into small bin six metres away for fear of hitting the wallpaper and getting told off.

“We can’t all be as brave as Michael Owen,” he lamented

Volodymyr Zelensky backs out of attempt to throw apple core into small bin six metres away for fear of hitting the wallpaper and getting told off. “We can’t all be as brave as Michael Owen,” he lamented
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Dua Lipa says she probably won’t bother reading Richard Wilson’s autobiography as you’d have to get through a lot of his life before you reached the part where he gets famous

Dua Lipa says she probably won’t bother reading Richard Wilson’s autobiography as you’d have to get through a lot of his life before you reached the part where he gets famous
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Wayne Rooney’s debut screenplay ‘Dr Carrot’ receives mixed reviews from critics ahead of its Netflix release on 23 December.

Empire magazine describes it as “ambitious but confusing”, while “even more unhinged than expected” is The Guardian’s frank assessment.

The “mesmerising”…

Wayne Rooney’s debut screenplay ‘Dr Carrot’ receives mixed reviews from critics ahead of its Netflix release on 23 December. Empire magazine describes it as “ambitious but confusing”, while “even more unhinged than expected” is The Guardian’s frank assessment. The “mesmerising”…
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