NEW VIDEO - Without a shadow of a doubt the most objectively haunted house I have ever entered in my life. I still cannot believe this happened. You’ll see what I mean…

“Overnight in a HAUNTED VICTORIAN MANSION”

youtu.be/zY93pWkY5-A

TOMORROW 🗝️

why do all of our parents sneeze like cartoon characters

NEW UNHINGED VIDEO - Being alone gets a bad wrap, but actually it’s cool and good and fun, especially in Hawaii 🌴 join me…

“I'm alone in Hawaii...”

youtu.be/0ZaHti3vOTE

Pssst...

ᴺᴱᵂ ᵁᴺᴴᴵᴺᴳᴱᴰ ᵀᴼᴹᴼᴿᴿᴼᵂ.

The trick to getting me to show up to… *ᶜᴴᴱᶜᴷˢ ᴺᴼᵀᴱˢ* ...literally anything, is this: Tell me that we’re going to be discussing The Mummy (1999) and like a genie, I will appear 😎

Get you a friend who understands you on this level

Um is anybody even excited for my wedding??

I’m single and don’t have any prospects and am not dating or talking to anybody at all and have a weird relationship with weddings but honestly would it kill you to be excited about the idea of it.

NEW UNHINGED VIDEO - Come have a little sleepover with me in my old broken down 2006 Prius 🥲

“Spending the Night in my 2006 Prius!”

youtu.be/OWqt3mVzmz8

Lowkey already do. I have a cool mom, god tier friends with good hearts, a cute little truck a cool job and also mozzarella sticks exist. But thank you and likewise 🫂 💕

Just once in my life I’d like to lie down on a grassy knoll with a friend and scout out an enemy camp through binoculars and talk about how we’re gonna tackle it is that so much to ask

The moment being referenced here is the most disturbing thing that has ever happened in a video for me and I’m gonna put a cute emoji at the end of this tweet to cheer me up because I hate thinking about the reality of this 🥰

NEW VIDEO - This video was extremely fun to make, but fair warning it also has some moments in it that are so unsettling that it made me cry while watching back the footage.

“Overnight in an EXTREMELY HAUNTED HOTEL”

youtu.be/opBLNhhXYjM

TOMORROW 🏨

SEE YOU SOON

Please don’t make me explain this but I think if I could get legally married to peanut butter I would

i got fired from the Cheesecake Factory

youtu.be/oODdpe6_W8s