Barry Sheen taking Greavsie around Donington Park Circuit on a Suzuki Katana at a leisurely pace. Just listen to the banter between them 😂

Welcome to the new processing facilities at Calais come October .

You won’t be buying a coffee waiting for a train - you’ll be spending it here in a queue

For what .

What benefits are there

None

Natalie Elphicke tried defecting to me first but I said no. I’m taking the trash out, not in. #PMQs

My boyfriend recently came home to find me crying. I had to tell him the kids behaviour had pushed me over the edge because I knew he'd take the piss if I told him it was because I got upset after a Liverpool match interview, because Jurgen Klopp is leaving.

It doesn’t matter what you think of Piers Morgan, watch this. Absolutely brutal, and thank god he called out this latest PR clown.

OMG! This wins the internet today!

Utterly brilliant. I'm crying. 😭😂👏👏👏

Your reminder that they knew we’d be worse off…

But did it anyway.

Passport e-gates fail at Heathrow, Gatwick and Manchester airports

Nationwide airport system crash, in The Times. A frequent occurrence, incl two weeks ago and the late May bank holiday last year. ⁦Malfunctioning Home Office⁩ & Govt malaise.

thetimes.co.uk/article/401031…

Blimey. With Bugs and Georgie Q for 5-0 v West Ham and back-to-back London derby wins for us watching the Chels after 2-0 against Tottenham on Thursday night.

My friend David (with whom I’ve been to games at Man City, Monaco…) seemingly unrepentant for his red trousers. #CFC 💙

'You must be very disappointed by the election results. Have you thought of resigning and giving someone else a chance?'
'Not really, Prime Minister'