🚨 People of Glasgow

What can you recommend doing in your fair City this weekend? 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Why does UK even bother entering. Terrible 😂

Get Mr fucking Blobby on

Worst film I’ve ever seen. Sid James wasn’t even in it.

Marriage

Fellas when she announces she’s single again

I refuse to look at any letters on my keyboard. That will be all

Me: 2 beers please
Them: They are for all inclusive guests only
Me: I am all inclusive
Them: No your not, you are self catering
Me: Yes, but I identify as all inclusive

“Can I get two Jagerbombs please mate?”

“It’s three for a fiver…”

“I’ll have nine then.”

Wake up, babe. The new Ronnie Pickering just dropped.

On reflection, not every alteration to a football shirt is a bad thing.

Pray for Newcastle 🙏🏻

'Dry January', but it's just her vagina reading your 'erotic writing'.

Going to Turkey. Returning from Turkey

'Extremist forces are trying to tear us apart. But that's enough about the Conservative Party... '
#DowningStreet
#GeneralElectionN0W

Rishi Sunak: “We must face down the extremists who would tear us apart.”

That’s the majority of the Tories gone then

Me too, Air Fryer. Me too!

Saint Veronica, absolutely FUMING that some moronic imbecile has gone and left a wet towel on the bed again!

you’re my favourite fuckface

i wonder how many of my followers are serial killers