Dracula warns about vampires

Why am I paying for prisons when I don’t even use them

If I was as rich and successful as her the only stories you’d hear about me would be about planning law violations when I build yet another water slide.

Lynne Ramsay’s extraordinary RATCATCHER has been re-released today. I remember seeing this in the theatre when it first opened. One of the most striking, poetic portraits of childhood on the cusp of change, if you can see it projected, in this lovely new 4K restoration, then do!

“Ok here’s my pitch…
What if it’s a Black guy in a relationship with a White woman. But get this - they’re on a slave plantation. But get THIS - it’s present day. BUT GET THIS - it was all a dream. …or was it!!??”

Twas a smasher of a writing day. Fingers crossed I can finish this draft earlier than expected

yesterday was bad. crossing my fingers that today will be better

Big high 5s to my fellow BBC writers! We beat the odds 😂 🙌🏾❤️

the thing about having ur job be Novelist is u have to have 5-10 decoy novels u tell people ur writing so no one can know the truth about the Real One

*taps sign*

There’s a bunch of people who are very dismissive of Dog Man, but I am begging them to actually read it.

I'd like to start a thread of tweet called 'Instead of..' where I suggest a woman artist you should look into instead of a male one. Specifically into women artists whose work has been appropriated by male artists, or generally a similar artist who is less of a dick.

This is the first time I’ve ever really even considered Nicholas Cage had a dad and wasn’t an immaculate conception.

OJ died, which is as good a reason as any to watch one of the greatest documentaries ever made, O.J.: Made In America

drafting on a bad hangover and wanting to close the laptop and perish under a duvet instead

Dragon Ball - Akira Toriyama - 1984/1995

I see stuff like this and I’m glad that my sub-Saharan turbo melanin has made me impervious to the pruning effects of the bland English sun but vulnerable to racism. So, swings & roundabouts

The 'the cass report doesn't say that' crowd don't have very good 'reading between the lines' skills. We should know what 'a separate type of therapy for under 25s to help with reducing how many people go to gender clinics' means by now.