😬

I’m worried about the impending tornado outbreak in the ohio river valley. Yall stay safe out there. Respect the polygon.

🙄

It might be an unpopular opinion, but I think hickory smoked ham is better without the brown sugar glaze

The four greatest words that have ever been spoken in the history of the world:

He is not here.

Goodyear’s goal every week should be to design a tire that wears out like wet newspaper, but is just good enough to not blow up.

That’s the tricky part. Has to wear like shit and also not grenade itself. It’s a fine line.

Hope y’all had a happy St. Patrick’s Day ☘️🇮🇪

music.youtube.com/watch?v=iedNUt…

There’s enough marbles up in the turns for Goodyear to reform into new sets of tires for next weekend

It’s not Bristol unless you have to scream directly into the ear of the person next to you to have the simplest of conversations

Biden sounds like the prospector in Blazing Saddles.

Speedball

He fell asleep in the motorcade

The 2024 State of the Union address. Brought to you by a vitamin B12 shot and adderall.

Imagine making your position on a constitutional question your whole personality, and then the supreme court rejects your position unanimously. Embarrassing.

How long until Teresa makes Cabarrus county rename Dale Earnhardt Blvd?

Plot twist: Pitbull was collaborating with Dolly about an ownership stake in the race team

😪

Hey Dale Earnhardt Jr. look what I’ve got