Son of Dad (@ThugRaccoons )

Son of Dad

Bio 🦝 Aspiring retiree 🦝
Location United States
Tweets 62,0K
Followers 14,9K
Following 3,9K
Account created 20-09-2012 20:18:20
ID 836281596

iPhone : Lets split, exclaimed Frankie, peeling out, theres a bunch of cops on our tail, and theyll skin us alive! He slammed on the gas, leaving behind two black stems of rubber like burnt skin on the asphalt. Get out the map, he said to Jane, my sense of direction is spotty.

iPhone : I don’t understand when people say they “need a reason to get up in the morning”. I mean, if you don’t have one already at hand, why go looking?

iPhone : 5 keeps bringing in crow feathers in the house
i keep telling 5 to stop bringing in crow feathers
5 says okay
then 5 continues to bring in crow feathers
continue for eternity.

iPhone : Maury Povich: Necessity is the mother of invention, but who’s the father?

Ingenuity: *sweating*

Luck:*biting fingernails*

Laziness: lmaooooooo

iPhone : Why wouldn’t I be cranky when I can’t get some time off from my kids to actually enjoy some warm food. I’m sitting here eating what might as well be peas porridge in a pot, nine days old...