Asshats. All of you.

Recipe for a great Saturday:
1 pot of tea
2 ibuprofen
3 cookies
Repeat every 4 hours.

Could be unpopular but I believe the children are our future

Twitter is like picking flowers in a field of crazies.

A bouquet of beautiful madness.

House of a 1000 Corpses? In this economy?

Getting high at 6 am is how I 'treat' my anxiety.
Let's talk about healthy coping mechanisms after I've finished this bowl, ok?

Hey mentally stable people what’s it like to shut your brain off is it peaceful

realizing your ex is ugly is so healing, like damn i really do love people for who they are

I had a twin brother but I ate him in the womb.

I can't believe I'll turn 16 years old this year.

Ok that’s enough funky music, white boy.

I’m vain but not, filter out lines on my face, vain.

It’s called yoghurt in England bc their tummies get upset at the slightest bit of culture

Heart me hard if you aren't a bot!

You're too old, fat man. Your tits are too big. Fuck off my porch.

— Fight Club

Am I the only person who gets creepy vibes from Mr. Beast? Bro is hard to look at.

If you're single, just be patient.

Your soulmate is almost done with those divorce papers.

Of course you'll never be successful, you're not a wealthy pervert.