Pro tip, ladies...

You're either sexy or you're not.

Unlike us guys, money ain't changing it

Not if you're Lockheed Martin

It's like they didn't even notice you while staring at their phones

Let's go.

We really need to go back to only property owners being allowed to vote.

Welcome to your weekend!

This chick is showing up a lot in my timeline now.

My experience is that redheads are down for anything

It could also mean you're too fucking lazy to shave, or no job to appear at

The people who actually run this country simply can't conceive of a world in which America isn't the boss.

They're not giving this up, and they could get us all immolated for it.

Tell me I'm wrong

New washer and dryer delivered this afternoon.

Now I get to figure out the launch sequence

The real reason black women felt 'represented' by OJ was because he killed his white ex-wife.

They totally forgave him for marrying a white woman in the first place

Go ahead.

Tell me he's wrong.

Sign me the hell up

You're still paying for this, people.

Ladies, what's your excuse..?

Here in Colorado, our lawmakers are really scrambling to find money for the 'migrant' invasion and homeless epidemic.

As a functional alcoholic with a job, this is bullshit

I realize that I probably don't have many followers too young to remember the OJ trial...

...But it was basically a year when it seemed like there was literally nothing else happening in the world.

Good times

I guess nobody told me it couldn't be both

I'd like to take the occasion of the Juice's passing to recall the one good thing to come out of his trial:

I found the respective reactions of my fellow white and black Americans to the verdict *far* more instructive than every sociology class I ever sat through

There is literally no end to shit that white people worry about other than the actual threat to our own societies.