there's way too much to do
all the time

I need to learn
how to breathe through
the crushing weight
of it all

may composure and focus
find me tall

I wish I could fondly recall
memories of warmth and joy
I wish I could feel
anything at all

I know really I do
except only dulled
so I unwind and unravel
striving to be fully present

thrown into the deep
the fluid of our reality

slowly sinking down
pulled by a weight

as the water above
gets heavier
the pressure is steep

begging for air
release the anchor
and swim up to breathe

hopefully in time
to avoid poisoning
breaching the surface
now floating

#poem

distractions don't find me
I find them

nervous and stalling
way too often

with effort and patience
I reclaim some time

taking in more air
I rise above

I fall
Fast, hitting hard
Shattering into
Many pieces

And yet
I am
Stars scattering
Across the sleeping world

Im wishes
For you to look upon
For me to grant
Just small ones
You know
Those
That mean the most
Like
Love
And kindness
And the touch
Of warmth
Upon a heart of woe

strange sensations
new tensions from
subtle reconnections

accept your depth
and feel closeness

find yourself and others
feel all the emotions
breathe and release

trying to heal and progress
you take one step closer
to balance and peace

electric battles
rage in my head
as the world spins
a swirling mess
just outside where I rest
in the eye of the hurricane
weak and full of dread

always fighting myself
more than anything else

the beauty of life
calls for inner peace
asking only one thing
to be cherished

with every step forward
my path narrows
and cliffs rise

I continue on
because I can't turn back
myself or the clock

I continue on
because I'll peak
then reach the other side

with every step forward
my path narrows
and cliffs rise
this precarious
situation
I question
to keep going
or turn back
but I can't
turn back
because
I'm being chased
by death
I have to keep going
and do my best

you can't devastate me
insulated from outside opinions
& you won't dare
cut my attachments

considering how quick
I move on yet hold on
I'll be dealing
with bottled up emotions
indefinitely

you won't betray me
any such breach of trust
will hurt you the most
& I'll always love

sensitive and caring
heart - both closed off
and wide open bleeding

because the whole world
can now be heard

peace is never had
we must build walls

remember to add
lots of windows
and doors

there will be times
when you feel trapped

remember your breath
have patience

it will pass
you will find a way

we all deserve
to try our best
you're worth it

why you're confined
has always been about fear
how can you expect
to overcome your fears
if you don't even know
how to face them

wandering, lost in a maze
escaping, turning away

there's always a way
to the courage
you always had
but couldn't grasp

find this path
become free

What makes me come back
to this place of sorrow
What makes me hold on
to this tapestry of tears
Is it depth of emotion
that creates addiction
Or is it simply
that touch has a memory
And I
keep holding on

#moomystic #MadVerse

to fix
what is broken
finding it
harder
to look away

afraid of making mistakes
so I stay silent and frozen
and my mistakes become
the silence and non-movement

maybe if I embrace the moment
I'll be able to break free
melting worries of future grief
and doubts of my abilities

set in my ways
repeating days
cozy rhythms
ingrained with age

my stony gaze
fails to bring
the world closer to me

unwilling to disrupt
the flow of poison

I fall underground
waiting for abrupt quakes
to shake me awake
into a new dance

I'll resurface
as lava torching the earth

how beautiful
this burning world—
how ugly.

I want to cry for every time the sky didn’t rip me open. That’s why I’ve been standing out here all these months, under purpling clouds and cackling moons. Waiting, waiting, for something exhilarating to wash me anew; something cold in which to swim; requited in which to grow.