guy who literally killed their dead name

if your roommates are always saying 'we have a mouse problem' instead of 'we have a mouse opportunity,' you need to upgrade your circle ☝️☝️🔑

no fucking way

if an unelected body of 9 people can look at a centuries-old document and claim that the document gives landlords the right to evict people in the middle of a global pandemic we should get rid of both that unelected body and that centuries-old document

Maybe they’re pushing and bribing people to get the vaccine.. because…… they want.. COVID to… go away????????? Maybe???????🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 just maybe?🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

“methinks” is like the funniest most underutilized word ever i cant think of any other word thats so scientifically formulated to piss you off

The thing I can't stop thinking about for Simone Biles is the narrative that she withdrew for her mental health, which is true, but she withdrew because her mental health put her physical health in real jeopardy. That's how mental health works. It's not just being nervous.

my very own flesh and blood human children

i am jack's septic eye

the media wants you to believe the left picture is worse

The stunning part of this story is that by 'minimum wage' they mean over $18 an hour. That's the base wage this story uses.

The federal minimum wage is $7.25 an hour.

According to this story, the minimum wage to afford rent on an apartment is $24 an hour.

my fiancée is fucking hot gorgeous perfect look at her what the hell

oh god oh no why #MyTwitterAnniversary

My guiding philosophy while working is currently “fuck over corporate capitalists but not your coworkers.“

im normal online. hello. :) ass

cant stop thinking abt them