for #WorldMentalHealthDay and every day i keep a framed pic of brian wilson near my desk to remind me things can always get better. oh there’s also a book by local author joe gerlitz.

Just read a book. I know, shocking. By ⁦High School Bud⁩ and it’s really funny and easy to read. Like Richard Brautigan but you don’t have to be high to laugh.

If anyone’s looking for something funny to read you should pick up this book! It’s written by a guy I used to work with, and the cover was designed by another guy I worked with! And follow this person for no related reason High School Bud

smile.amazon.com/dp/057833187X/…

Shameful plug: while taking a break from writing mediocre High School Bud tweets, I wrote a hopefully-better-than-mediocre book of stupid short stories. Hey, if it has @lukeburbank's stamp of approval, it can't be all bad, can it? Don't answer that.

amazon.com/Bedtime-Storie…

Just circling back to an earlier topic...is it okay to eat Tide PODS yet?

Whoopsies.

#TDF 2021 #TDF 21 #TDF #TourdeFrance #TourDeFrance2021

It's always super awkward whenever both pizza guys show up on my doorstep at the same time.

Domino's Pizza Pizza Hut

One minute, it's 'dress for the job you want, not the one you have.'

The next minute, it's 'why are you wearing a San Diego Chicken costume to this meeting?'

Make up your mind, boss.

If you ever think about giving up, just remember that Meryl Streep was cut by her high school basketball team as a sophomore. #inspiration

Guessing I'm not the only one who's been wearing his rollerblades under the desk for the last two hours, waiting for a break in Zoom meetings. #Spring

Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids. #Perseverance Rover #mars2021 #Perseverance

I wish I could find someone who looks at me the way Ram Jam's bassist looks at the crowd. #ValentinesDay #BlackBetty

R.I.P. #BettyWhite . She's still alive. I just hope she's having a peaceful rest right now at her home because she's pretty old.

Last seen...

#InaugurationDay #JoeBiden #TrumpsLastDay

Now this?!

#WashingtonDC #Capitol Hill #TrumpRally #Capitol

If the actress who portrayed Kevin's mom in Home Alone looks familiar, it's because she's also the actress who portrayed Kevin's mom in Home Alone 2.

#CatherineOhara #HomeAlone Macaulay Culkin #Christmastime

Nevada ballot counters taking a little break. Will get back at it around 3 a.m.

#ElectionResults2020 #Election2020 #Biden2020 #TRUMP2020ToSaveAmerica #Nevada2020

Last night’s debate upset me more than when Stephanie drove a car into the kitchen.

Whether you love #Trump or hate him, I think we can agree that we should all hate him.

ME, during every dog movie: 'Wow, this dog is amazing and it has such a special relationship with its owner and everything is so great and it looks like it's going to last forever and...DAMN IT.'