Laura Marie (@lmegordon )

Laura Marie

Bio Rack appreciation account.
IG: @lmegordon

Location Good Missouri, USA
Tweets 61,1K
Followers 11,2K
Following 2,2K
Account created 27-11-2013 02:55:07
ID 2217045360

Android : Sometimes I sit here drinking alone in the dark in this 306-year-old farmhouse, listening to Warren Zevon, marveling at the fact that even back then people knew how to make something that could put up with this much bullshit for so long; meanwhile I’m ready to disintegrate at 40.

Android : If I retweeted your joke, it means you're kinda funny and I know where the retweet button is. So congrats to the both of us, but to me more.

Android : every boyfriend gift guide is just:
-hot sauce
-alcohol
-new underwear for when he shits himself from all the hot sauce and alcohol
-a watch

Android : Well that was a really nice 3 days of feeling okay but back to the grind of being not okay at all because I mean, there's a holiday in less than 48 hours that only I will put any effort into, so why should I be okay!? Holidays only work if Mom is an anxious, depressed mess right?

Twitter Web App : I was shopping for a particular blood pressure supplement. I said, “well I’m not paying that much just to live.” 12 year old said that’s what she’s going to put on my tombstone.

Twitter Web App : I’ve made it 52 years without a single tattoo. Not saying I will, but any suggestions? Dick on forehead like a sharpie drawing has already been rejected.