vigorously performing cunnilingus to prove to myself i’m not gay even though i find vaginas revolting

how does the stock market work?

The childhood-mortality rate in this country must’ve been so high before water bottles. Grateful for all these life-saving advancements!

Me, if dragging a cop w/ my car was a crime.

reading a business book at the park to repel any unwanted advances from attractive / interesting women

we need a support group for victims of growth mindset / hustle culture indocrination

Any women out there want a FWB struggling w/ erectile dysfunction ?

This is how you spell sexy

Zombie Rich Guy in LA Costume: all-white retro Nikes, vaguely-performance khakis, expensive plain-white t, navy-blue chore coat, kinda messy & kinda short hair, shaves 2x/week, big silver watch, one beaded bracelet, Tesla SUV, talks about travel / home remodel 90% of time

guy that hangs skateboard decks like art

a “just figure out how to make more money” podcaster guy that lives in a shit hole state to avoid a state income tax

trying to teach my son not to to buy into consumerism but also why skechers shoes suck

I matched w/ a LA woman on Bumble that wears clown make-up and wants to peg me, and you all are worried about 13% CA income tax?!?

Enjoy your Denali, I’ll be in a dungeon.

started listening to business podcasts so i can sound even more like a douche

10 Worst Neighborhoods in LA (2024 edition):

10. West Hollywood
9. Hollywood Hills
8. Westwood
7. Los Feliz
6. Silver Lake
5. Beverly Hills
4. Bel-Air
3. Brentwood
2. Santa Monica
1. Venice

You seem like you’re from Highland Park, Texas (derogatory)