Do better @oregonepiscopal don’t you already have enough blood on your hands from the deaths of your students in the deadliest Mt. Hood alpine disaster in history?

I Responded to Your “hey” and You Ghosted Me - A True Twitter Story.

Hotdogs are descended from an ancient species of hotwolves, ingredients unknown.

Me: I'm lonely

Also me: Ew, people.

Why is it that every turn we take there seems to be a road block?

So funny how quiet things get when you block the trash. Uncanny.

“Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women easier access to mainstream society” Rush Limbaugh

You ever think you know what someone else thinks and then get mad at what you think they think, or are you normal?

I’m doing my best, my best just sucks ass

[first time parachuting]

me: holy shit, my instructor is ugly as fuck

friend: *avoiding eye contact*

me: he's still strapped to my back, isn't he?