She’s going to prison for 45 years 💔

napped all afternoon, as promised

no one is more impressed with my own boobs than me

how often do you wash your towels nyt says its not enough and by the looks of most of you id say thats probably true

bisexual for attention girlies do it different (they make sure every one is looking)

gently, I think criticisms of 'diaspora poets,' selecting from the legitimate ones, anyway, are that they tend to aestheticize the suffering of people they aren't in direct contact with in the service of their own self-aggrandizing art. and, well...

I’m every baby’s best friend

Im tired and grumpy who want me

this one sounds so defeated

Unless you show me pictures of your cat we are not friends

The 6 pm snoozies

attention to all reply guys tier 3 and higher, we are no longer doing courtesy likes on replies that contain the same dumb joke everyone else is making. please pass the news to your subordinates

no one has ever suffered so much

wait white collar is a different show than suits

it's always nice to see mexican flags and people supporting checo around the world, makes me so happy.

Financial advisor slash director

What a loser he’s not even fucking or sucking

stroll driving in to the back of riccardo is still so fucking funny

cross country big boob apology tour

🚨 baby ducks 🚨