Next pride month, no mofe mayo/mayonnaise. We fuckin wkrh fil littke yt gayo

I don't know exactly what this one means, cause i was very drunk when i put it in drafts, but i still vibe with it

Horny on main but irl

I wish there was an app like letterboxd but for rating the best and worst tweets i come across each day

Real poo for my real friends

Shampoo

Fuck

Sorry babe i don't have any spaghetti but maybe we could eat the macaroni lady & the tramp style instead?

Okay gamers. I'm gonna delete the app again here in a minute, so time to tweet all the drafts that I've been storing up

Not as many people got my Halloween costume as I would have liked.

doing push ups makes me want to peg someone

I'm so mad right now

how to make friends as an adult who is not in college and also works at home and also is not extroverted

Oh no, who let me get on twitter while high and unsupervised

Don't judge me for little caesars but since fuckin when can i order coronas on doordash

I have covid and am bored. Reply and I'll doodle your pfp (example below)

Dear Daddy Magic :

Watch your ass.

a relationship is just having a girl best friend that you have sex with sometimes