There’s a puka shell necklace in my closet that talks to me like the Green Goblin mask.

A rotating device that holds you down when your anxiety takes hold. Call it a fidgets pinner.

Lunch is one of the most important 7 meals of the day.

In the top 7 anyway.

Daveastated Rob Craig
The final Arena Topic is 🥁

Library 📚

You have 24 hours to craft a new tweet that fits within the topic.

Wired ear buds = mittens with strings

Seconds after the card game rules are explained

Them: There’s too much sugar in everything; we all need to cut back.

Food show hosts: Now there’s so much acid in the stomach you need this handful of sugar to tone it down.

Sometimes I like to mess with my husband and text things like “I’m leaving y…” And an hour later text “your computer on the table”

Making a wreath of all my kids’ lost teeth to hang on my door to ward off solicitors.

Them: I'm having vegan for lunch.

Hannibal Lecter: What a coincidence.

Kicked off another flight for trying to start the 'give us a barrel roll!' chant

If you see me in my car cookie monstering some treats mind ya business

Not to brag but I’ve reset my life more times than super mario

lunch time or what i like to call sitting in my car and listening to true crime for thirty minutes.

My husband has some nerve commenting on my grey hair like he isn’t the cause at least half of them

my husband thinks i accepted his apology but wait until he sees that i rearranged the tool shed

As I get older, what I consider lunchtime gets earlier and earlier.

Singing 'Oops...I Did It Again', but it's just about me eating my lunch before 10AM

Who called them OJ conspiracies and not Pulp Fiction

I hate when the emojis don’t cooperate 😤